Dalam senarai dibawah bukan semuanya sesuai untuk yang menganut agama islam. Jadi ambil lah mana yang bersesuaian untuk diaplikasi.
Disebabkan terlalu banyak senarai ini saya kurang masa untuk membuat terjemahan dalam bahasa melayu. Harap maaf!!!
1. Upon returning home find her first before doing anything else and give her a hug.
2. Ask her specific questions about her day that indicate an awareness of what she was
planning to do (e.g., ʺHow did your appointment with the doctor go?ʺ).
3. Practice listening and asking questions.
4. Resist the temptation to solve her problemsempathize instead.
5. Give her twenty minutes of unsolicited, quality attention (donʹt read the newspaper or be
distracted by anything else during this time).
6. Bring her cut flowers as a surprise as well as on special occasions.
7. Plan a date several days in advance, rather than waiting for Friday night and asking her what
she wants to do.
8. If she generally makes dinner or if it is her turn and she seems tired or really busy, offer to
9. Compliment her on how she looks.
10. Validate her feelings when she is upset.
11. Offer to help her when she is tired.
12. Schedule extra time when traveling so that she doesnʹt have to rush.
13. When you are going to be late, call her and let her know.
14. When she asks for support, say yes or no without making her wrong for asking.
15. Whenever her feelings have been hurt, give her some empathy and tell her ʺIʹm sorry you
feel hurt.ʺ Then be silent; let her feel your understanding of her hurt. Donʹt offer solutions or
explanations why her hurt is not your fault.
16. Whenever you need to pull away, let her know you will be back or that you need some time
to think about things.
17. When youʹve cooled off and you come back, talk about what was bothering you in a
respectful, nonblaming way, so she doesnʹt imagine the worst.
18. Offer to build a fire in wintertime.
19. When she talks to you, put down the magazine or turn off the TV and give her your full
20. If she usually washes the dishes, occasionally offer
to wash the dishes, especially if she is tired that day.
21. Notice when she is upset or tired and ask what
she has to do. Then offer to help by doing a few of her ʺto doʺ items.
22. When going out, ask if there is anything she wants you to pick up at the store, and
remember to pick it up.
23. Let her know when you are planning to take a nap or leave.
24. Give her four hugs a day. dive er four hugs a day.
25. Call her from work to ask how she is or to share something exciting or to tell her ʺI love
26. Tell her ʺI love youʺ at least a couple of times every day.
27. Make the bed and clean up the bedroom.
28. If she washes your socks, turn your socks right side out so she doesnʹt have to.
29. Notice when the trash is full and offer to empty it.
30. When you are out of town, call to leave a telephone number where you can be reached and
to let her know you arrived safely.
3 1. Wash her car.
32. Wash your car and clean up the interior before a date with her.
33. Wash before having sex or put on a cologne if she likes that.
34. Take her side when she is upset with someone.
35. Offer to give her a back or neck or foot massage (or all three).
36. Make a point of cuddling or being affectionate sometimes without being sexual.
37. Be patient when she is sharing. Donʹt look at your watch.
38. Donʹt flick the remote control to different channels when she is watching TV with you.
39. Display affection in public.
40. When holding hands donʹt let your hand go limp.
41. Learn her favorite drinks so you can offer her a
choice of the ones that you know she already likes.
42. Suggest different restaurants for going out; donʹt put the burden of figuring out where to go
43. Get season tickets for the theater, symphony, opera, ballet, or some other type of
performance she likes.
44. Create occasions when you both can dress up.
45. Be understanding when she is late or decides to change her outfit.
46. Pay more attention to her than to others in public.
47. Make her more important than the children. Let the children see her getting your attention
first and foremost.
48. Buy her little presents‐like a small box of chocolates or perfume.
49. Buy her an outfit (take a picture of your partner along with her sizes to the store and let
them help you select it).
50. Take pictures of her on special occasions.
5 1. Take short romantic getaways.
52. Let her see that you carry a picture of her in your wallet and update it from time to time.
53. When staying in a hotel, have them prepare the room with something special, like a bottle
of champagne or sparkling apple juice or flowers.
54. Write a note or make a sign on special occasions such as anniversaries* and birthdays.
55. Offer to drive the car on long trips.
56. Drive slowly and safely, respecting her preferences. After all, she is sitting powerless in the
57. Notice how she Is feeling and comment on it ‐ʺYou look happy today ʺ or ʺYou look
tiredʺ‐and then ask a question like ʺHow was your day?ʺ
58. When taking her out, study in advance the directions so that she does not have to feel
responsible to navigate.
59. Take her dancing or take dancing lessons together.
60. Surprise her with a love note or poem.
61. Treat her in ways you did at the beginning of the relationship.
62. Offer to fix something around the house. Say ʺWhat needs to be fixed around here? I have
some extra time.ʺ Donʹt take on more than you can do.
63. Offer to sharpen her knives in the kitchen.
64. Buy some good Super Glue to fix things that are broken.
65. Offer to change fight bulbs as soon as they go out.
66. Help with recycling the trash.
67. Read out loud or cut out sections of the newspaper that would interest her.
68. Write out neatly any phone me~ you may take for her
69. Keep the bathroom floor clean and dry it after taking a shower.
70. Open the door for her.
71. Offer to carry the groceries.
72. Offer to carry heavy boxes for her.
73. On trips, handle the luggage and be responsible for packing it in the car.
74. If she washes the dishes or it is her rum, offer to help scrub pots or other difficult tasks.
75. Make a ʺto fixʺ list and leave it in the kitchen. When you have extra time do something on
that fist for her. Donʹt let it get too long.
76. When she prepares a meal, compliment her cooking.
77. When listening to her talk, use eye contact.
78. Touch her with your hand sometimes when you talk to her.
79. Show interest in what she does during the day, in the books she reads and the people she
80. When listening to her, reassure her that you are interested by making little noises like ah ha,
uh‐huh, oh, mmhuh, and hmmmm.
8 1. Ask her how she is feeling.
82. If she has been sick in some way, ask for an update and ask how she is doing or feeling.
83. If she is tired offer to make her some tea.
84. Get ready to go to sleep together and get in bed at the same time.
85. Give her a kiss and say good‐bye when you leave.
86. Laugh at her jokes and humor.
87. Verbally say thank you when she does things for you.
88. Notice when she gets her hair done and give a reassuring compliment.
89. Create special time to be alone together.
90. Donʹt answer the phone at intimate moments or if she is sharing vulnerable feelings.
91. Go bicycling together, even if itʹs just a short ride.
92. Organize and prepare a picnic. (Remember to bring a picnic cloth.)
93. If she handles the laundry, bring the clothes to the cleaners or offer to do the wash.
94. Take her for a walk without the children.
95. Negotiate in a manner that shows her that you want her to get what she wants and you also
want what you want. Be caring, but donʹt be a martyr.
96. Let her know that you missed her when you went away.
97. Bring home her favorite pie or dessert.
98. If she normally shops for the food, offer to do the food shopping.
99. Eat lightly on romantic occasions so that you donʹt become stuffed and tired later.
100. Ask her to add her thoughts to this list.
10 1. Leave the bathroom seat down.
Mungkin apa yang disenaraikan nampak hanya kecil apa yang dilakukan oleh suami kepada isteri tetapi ia mampu memberikan kesan yang mendalam kepada isteri. Ini kerana perbuatan suami ini mampu untuk memberikan keyakinan kepada isteri yang dia masih dicintai dan suami masih mengambil berat mengenai mereka.
Kesan pada kemudiannya, isteri turut menyayangi suami maka secara tak langsung kehendak ‘cinta’ terus mekar walaupun selepas berkahwin.
Sumber dipetik dari buku penulisan John Gray “Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus”